ALRIGHT

So, my name is Parnell, and there is a new way to be safe on the internet.

This blog!

Remember when people wanted to keep their identities all hidden, because rapists were going to jump through AOL chat and rape them? Now it is just children on PictoChat in malls getting drawings of really veiny penises that we're supposed to be completely afraid of, and they forgot to keep warning us about rapists.

See, I just reminded you about internet rapists and how strong they can be. If you were not reading this blog you would not be as safe. That's what we at BE CAREFUL ON THE INTERNET are here to get you up on: safety!

Internet tips are only the first step of the iceberg. There will be huge changes coming, if I can get my friend who lives with me -- we call him "Mr. Computer Science" -- to make us a better website. Here's the thing, we're starting with a guide, then we're gong to save you from the internet by building our own internet!

Look, if you want to look up movies and end up seeing a picture of a guy with a pretty big battery sticking out of his skull (I can't believe I even came up with that) instead of a picture of Johnny Depp singing about Sweeny Todd (have you seen that movie yet please tell me how it is in the comments section), then keep using other websites besides this one. Go be my guest.

Or you can just be my guest, and use the safe internet, first on this blog, and soon on a place probably also called BE CAREFUL ON THE INTERNET (I didn't hyperlink that because that websites doesn't exist yet because it would be different from this one) where you get everything that is cool about the normal internet except without dangerous websites where you can accidentally get information to rapists.